My emotional intensity sometimes leaves growth and facing my fears feels like fighting literal demons. From the outside looking in, if I were transparent in those moments, I’m sure I’d look like I’m losing my mind. In those moments, I feel like I am just a little bit. I also believe, though, that I require things to be bold and loud in order for me to remember them. Some days I still question whether I have my shit together-ish and just have strange experiences sometimes or I’m hitting bouts of psychosis and incredibly coincidental times. That lingering doubt is what leaves my heart racing when I consider sharing my process.
Tell Me Your Signs
there’s whispers
in the dark
when you close your eyes
there’s lights
flashing for attention
It’s the part
you never mention
a perfume that lingers
your nostrils burn
on your shoulders
gentle fingers
rub a spot that’s worn
blue man
in the doorway
here to guide
I want to follow
but there’s no light
away into nothing
maybe it was the sun
take another breath in
no need to run
holding, holding
a little bit longer
if I never breathe out
maybe I’ll feel stronger
read
but never into things
stop looking
without losing your ability to observe
retire your judge
you’re not qualified
to make this call
my sentence
will be written
not served
freedom
because you can choose
will you live
in this elaborate illusion
or will you allow
yourself to see
those are signs
not delusions
Much love, until next time.
Madeline May I... 