I give up and try again at least half a dozen times a day. It may not be over the same thing but it’s with the same amount of certainty, both in the need to quit and the need to keep going. I wonder if I keep getting pulled, tug-a-warred back and forth in both directions, if maybe one day I’ll split and everything can finally come gushing out. Fingers crossed.
Endless Questions
How do I get past the idea of attack?
How do I shake the feeling that someone is after me?
Afraid to step forward
Awaiting the seemingly inevitable pull back
How do I know I might fall and proceed anyway?
How to I acknowledge my failure publicly?
Never wanting to try
Uneasy at the idea of being seen
What’s the longest I can post a video before taking it down?
How many words can I shout before I silence myself?
Unsure if I’m feeling the discomfort of others
Perhaps simply projecting my own
How do I let go of the fear that’s controlling me?
How do I lean forward into the unknown?
Much love, until next time.
Madeline May I... 