I think I’ve finally hit my breaking point. I think I’ve finally found a moment where I’m more tired of the energy it takes to hold everything in than what it requires to dig the words out of the depths of my soul to put them in front of someone. I’ve been waiting a longContinue reading “Poetry Series – Speak”
Author Archives: Payge Gray
Poetry Series – Escape Artist
I used to think that the place there was the most love was the one where I felt safe lashing out, throwing fits, taking my anger out, and then turning around and apologizing when I was done. I have a hard time accepting that I thought that’s what love was but then I remind myselfContinue reading “Poetry Series – Escape Artist”
Poetry Series – Old Self
There’s irony in writing a poem about rifling through old feelings as I’m sitting here trying to work my way through past, repressed, feelings. I hang onto the idea that there’s a difference between finally feeling what you’ve never actually felt and indulging in memories to escape from the present. Old Self I thought IContinue reading “Poetry Series – Old Self”
Poetry Series – Facing Want
Do you ever notice the subtle way our wants are filtered through our beliefs first? Have you ever caught yourself wanting something only to immediately find lists of reasons that you just can’t have whatever it is? Why do we so often believe ourselves undeserving of what would make us the happiest, most fulfilled? IContinue reading “Poetry Series – Facing Want”
Poetry Series – Mixed Up Emotions
Sometimes I feel guilty for just how much I enjoy spending time alone, even away from my partner, but the truth is it’s the only way I have right now to clear out the noise and get in touch with myself. I didn’t realize until last week that I keep getting sick at family partiesContinue reading “Poetry Series – Mixed Up Emotions”
Poetry Series – Lightning
A psychiatrist once explained to me that when you’re having trouble falling back asleep, one of the worst things you can do is stay in bed tossing and turning. Get up, make a cup of tea, read a book, stretch. Whatever you do, don’t lay in bed and let your mind fester. After a littleContinue reading “Poetry Series – Lightning”
Poetry Series – Rebirth
Have you ever looked back on life and realized that you’ve grown so much you don’t even recognize the version of yourself that would make the decisions you did? Accept the behaviors that you tolerated? I still have trouble sometimes finding the ability to understand that past versions of myself, to have compassion for her.Continue reading “Poetry Series – Rebirth”
Poetry Series – Channel
Do you ever feel like you’re seeing a perspective too tall for your body? Does that even make sense? I have yet to meet someone else that says yes but sometimes, out of nowhere, I’m suddenly seeing much too high for whatever would be picked up by my bodily eyes. Do you ever smell smellsContinue reading “Poetry Series – Channel”
Poetry Series – Self Survey
What you quickly learn when you commit to growth is that you will often outgrow the people and environments around you. I find this to be the hardest part of continuing the journey – just how many people you have to let go, how many things you find the need to walk away from. WhenContinue reading “Poetry Series – Self Survey”
Poetry Series – Subconscious Murderer
I always have this fear that the bits of darkness I own, let slip out in my stories and poems, will come back to haunt me and be what drags me down. Honestly, I think that’s the fear we all have and it’s what usually stops us in our tracks to plug up whatever fuckingContinue reading “Poetry Series – Subconscious Murderer”
Madeline May I... 