I had to leave my boyfriend a 5-page letter explaining that I’m having a hard time, don’t know how to be open about it and how he can help “de-escalate” me when I’m withdrawing and disassociating. Okay, I didn’t HAVE to but I either needed to do it or I was going to self-sabotage theContinue reading “Poetry Series – Hello, Demons”
Tag Archives: Personal Blog
Poetry Series – Unified Silence
I don’t know what it means to get bored anymore. Maybe put me in isolation and the stillness, silence, will finally drive me over the edge but anything short of that is so welcome right now. I only want to live somewhere big enough that I can find a room in the house where IContinue reading “Poetry Series – Unified Silence”
Poetry Series – Walking Out
I’ve been in a writing funk for a while now and really what that means is that I have a backlog of stuff that I haven’t allowed an outlet for but desperately need out. The world has been changing, a lot has been happening and with the weight of the chaos, I am even moreContinue reading “Poetry Series – Walking Out”
Poetry Series – Too Fat
I’ve always been prone to nightmares but they seem to creep in the most when my waking life feels like it’s at its best. One moment I applaud myself for not taking things too personally, not projecting the past, and allowing myself to eat when I want to eat without telling myself I’m not worthy.Continue reading “Poetry Series – Too Fat”
Poetry Series – Disorderly
I’ve spent a little chunk of time delving into the topics of shame and vulnerability, sitting with the ideas, and seeing what’s surfaced. A lot has surfaced. There’s a lot ready to come out and be healed from as soon as we give ourselves the time and space to be present with it. I’m stillContinue reading “Poetry Series – Disorderly”
Poetry Series – Sarah
I’ve reached a point where I’m halted. There’s this brick wall of shame, guilt, and fear that I desperately need to smash down. Shame is connected to who we are, guilt is connected to what we do, and fear is connected to what’s to come. Brick by brick, confession by confession, taking the time toContinue reading “Poetry Series – Sarah”
Relation-ship
In relation to a ship, I’m ready to jump, always. I’m used to the flow of not knowing what to expect. The water will pull me to the next place as long as I’m not tethered to this structure. I hear structure is good, though. I hear we need stability in our life. Coach. CoachContinue reading “Relation-ship”
Faces
The faces in the reflections are never the same faces as in the trees, clouds, leaves. The faces in the reflections are always looking back, looking at me, emotion heavily present across their face but the faces aren’t me. Reflections aren’t just for mirrors. I see them in the windows, on the shiny surface ofContinue reading “Faces”
Writing
Not writing feels like lying, even if only by omission. Not writing feels like I’m hiding. Have you ever played hide and seek with someone that’s terrible at seeking? Hiding parts of yourself. You get bored. Stir crazy. You start moving around, peeking around the corner of the barricade to see if they’re even close.Continue reading “Writing”
Poetry Series – Constants
Everything is changing and it’s leaving me feeling like I’m losing my mind. It’s like life is running faster than I can keep up with and all I can do is slow down even more and watch. I look around and wonder how everyone else is doing it? Is everyone else falling apart behind closedContinue reading “Poetry Series – Constants”
Madeline May I... 